Friday, May 05, 2006

MI-4: getting me to go see MI-3

Greetings, dear readers, and HAPPY FRIDAY!

So I'm driving to work this morning (in a borrowed car no less since the Tracker is limited to a 30 mile radius from home) because I have a doctor appointment after work. I decided to take a break from playing the Queen's Greatest Hits CD for the 40 millionth time and listen to NPR for a while. On Fridays they have movie reviews by some dude from the L.A. Times and I enjoy hearing what he has to say, even when I don't agree with him.

Uninterestingly enough, today's review was about the latest entry in the Mission Impossible series: M:i:III starring everyone's favorite couch-jumping, Scientology-spouting, non-uterus-having expert on post-partum depression and psychiatry in general. While the acting didn't get over-the-top accollades (unless you count a 'he jumped from 80 feet from the top of a building - that has to count for something'), co-writer/director J.J. Abrams got kudos for an entertaining plot and well-done action movie. In case you aren't familiar with Mr. Abrams, he's one of the geniuses behind the television programs "Alias" and "Lost". I generally really appreciate his talents and enjoy the results of his creative process. And hey, I like a good action movie here and there (Die Hard, anyone?).

Too bad I will not be able to see this film, no matter how wonderful it might be. A dollar vote for J.J. Abrams and this film is a dollar vote for the exceptionally offensive (to me at least) Tom Cruise. In the words of George Sr., "Not gonna do it." (or maybe that was Dana Carvey's imitation of George Sr.?) Anyhoo, I made that mistake with Steven Spielberg's "War of the Worlds" and I have carried the guilt with me ever since.

My thought on the entertainment business is this, celebrities, so listen up! You are selling fantasy, escape, dreams and diversion from the banality of everyday life. Your films, television programs, plays and records entertain us and make us forget for a second that we have bills to pay, mouths to feed and problems to deal with. Even the tabloid news is selling this - analyzing the flaws and foibles of the celebrity du jour (while admittedly not healthy) makes some people feel better about miseries in their own lives. You want my hard-earned dollars? Sell me fantasy, escape and dreams. Don't tell me about your politics (yes, George Clooney, that even includes you), your religion, or anything else controversial - I just don't care what you think. In a nutshell, save your personal drama for your mama.

And as for you Mr. Cruise, I advise you to ask your glass-eyed baby mama to pull out a roll of duct tape and secure your motor mouth shut. Then MAYBE after 5 or 10 years of no stupid statements or antics I MIGHT consider seeing another of your movies.

(between you and me, dear reader, I still won't go to see his movies but didn't I just give you the best visual of the moron with tape over his mouth? Now THAT's fantasy baby!!)


Super Woman said...

Yeah, I'm really leaning towards NOT seeing MI 3. Maybe on DVD, but it's not worth the effort of seeing in the theater. Not to mention the fact that Tom is REALLY starting to creep me out.

Lauren said...

The only Tom Snooze movie I ever saw was Top Gun. . . He couldn't act then and I doubt that has changed much. His politics and spiritual views just give me more reasons to ignore him.

Sam said...

I never liked the look of Mi-3 myself, but saying that, i haven't watched a mainstream action film in months/years? I do like a die hard film when i'm in a sort of simple mood, but of course i like the foreign films, epsecially cantonese of course, actually thats just remeinded me, have got one to review now. sorry i haven't visited in a bit, time creaps up on me, there's so many bloggers, i 've deproved of a visit in the last few weeks, hope your doing well anyway.

Kristin said...

Amen! I despise it when actors and actresses get on the soapbox. I used to like George Clooney. Not anymore. He's a loudmouth (even if I agreed with his politics). That's all I can ever think of when I see him on screen.

Tom Cruise is a serious nut. Why did I have to find that out? He just RUINED some good movies for me. Ones that I will have a hard time ever watching again. Why, why, why did he have to go all berzerko? Nicole Kidman must have really been keeping him in check all those years. I am glad she escaped his freakiness.

I only caught bits and pieces of MI:2 and was not all that impressed. But I really want to see this MI because of Keri Russell and J J Abrams. However, I will most likely rent the thing through Netflix, so the least amount of financial revenue goes his way.

buddha_girl said...

Oooooooooh can I get an AMEN????? said it so well, sister! Husband Guy joked the other day about me going to see the MI3 thing. I merely glared at him. Nothing Tom Cruise is in will ever earn a penny from my pocket.

I thought Brooke Shield's response to having given birth on the same day and in the same hospital was classic!

leo myshkin said...

even tho the copy i saw of war of the worlds was a pirated copy, i still felt ripped off. it was a piece of junk.

i'll wait for the south park version of mi 3.

yellowdog granny said...

they ruined a great sci-fi movie with cruises version of war of the world..fucked it up..
is it me or is he really losing it..i mean really losing it..his laugh is becoming more hysterical and that manic look in his eyes tells me if the wrong person says the right thing to him he is going to go over the deep talking wrap around suit in a rubber room...

apositivepessimist said...

yeah i can see little ole katie having the “wtf was i thinking” thought in a few years. thank gawd our nic woke [or was woken] up to that fact before it was too late.

he has indeed turned into a wanker. thumbs down to him.

yeah, thumbs pressed down into his sockets gouging his eyes out...oopsie i typed aloud.

Reg said...

I'm with BG... AMEN SISTA!

I saw MI-1 in the theatres. About two thirds of the way through I found myself asking, "What is going on?" I had no idea who the bad guys were or even the good guys for that matter. At the end of the movie, I was so disappointed at the lousy tying up of the non-existent plot that I vowed not to pay good money to see another one. Now I know I saw MI-2, but I think it was via Netflix. Anyhoo, long story longer, I couldn't tell you the plots and I have no intention of spending cash for MI-3.

Tom, go home to God-only-knows-whose baby and shut up already.

Nancy said...

I would love for Tom to come and visit my locked unit. He wouldn't make it through half the day. hehehe

Jon said...

I'll go ahead and admit to being the only one on this page that liked "War of the Worlds." I bought it the first day it came out and saw it three times in the theater. Course, I'm always game for movies with people being exterminated in abundance; That, and I have a weak spot for Spielberg. I thought it was his best thriller-type flick in years, though "Munich" easily kicked the shit out of it in terms of brilliance.

As far as Tom goes, he's like anyone else on the celluloid screen: His politics/religious beliefs aside, if he can keep me entertained for two hours, I don't give a shit if he calls on Xenu or Allah.

That being said, I hated the first "MI" film, didn't bother with 2, and will likely skip "3," even though I'm a big Phillip Seymour Hoffman fan.