Toy Review with the Lady Shark: Nerf Swarmfire

So, my nephew turned 9 years old earlier this week and true to form, Auntie Rocky coughed up the loudest, most obnoxious gift I could come up with.  Well, that's not entirely true; he told me what he wanted and I went out and bought it.  I'm a little bit afraid that if I end up being one of those women who has a child at like age 48 everyone I know will come out of the woodwork with vengeance in their eyes to gift the kid with play-do, beads and cheap plastic crap made in China that makes the most annoying noises possible.  And Barney.  They'll definitely screw me by hooking up the kid with Barney because I do hate him so.

But I digress.  So the boy turned 9 and in addition to camouflage duct tape ('cuz what household doesn't need that!?), he told me he wanted the Nerf Dart-Tag Series Swarmfire.  Actually, he blurted out Igottahaveaswarmfireohpleaseohplease or something like that before I even finished asking the age old question, "What do you want for your birthday?"  Just to mess with him, I only walked in with the duct tape and Ghostbusters on DVD - you should have seen his face.  His mama taught him well as he said nothing that indicated he was anything other than grateful to be thought of, but his eyes said, "Fool, why ya playin' me!? The Swarmfire don't fit in that tiny little package!"

After I had my fun I let him run out to the car and get the BIG box that did indeed contain the Swarmfire.  Sometimes I feel a little guilty having single-handedly armed the child to the teeth with his own Nerf arsenal.  Regardless, this weapon is BOSS.  It launches 20 darts in rapid automatic fire in 5 seconds.  Each dart averages about 30 feet.  (I KNOW!!)  Plus I accidentally got clipped with one in the keester and from firsthand experience I can now say with emphasis that firing this bad boy will give one fantastic satisfaction knowing that your enemy will have tiny red welts on his butt if he gets in your line of fire closer than 10 feet.  And did I mention that the darts have velcro on the tips?  Massive fun pulling darts out of hair, curtains and your sister's expensive sweater.  Awesome in every single way.

Plus, it led me to this delightful review which if you forward to 2:13 you can see this sucker in action:



There should be no question now whatsoever what I want for MY birthday.  Igottahaveaswarmfireohpleaseohplease!!